Wednesday, September 22, 2010

I'm Neked (adj. ne'kid)... and other inadequate metaphors

We have a friend who said, " There's 'naked' and then there's 'neked'. Naked means you aren't wearing any clothes, neked means you aren't wearing any clothes... and you're up to something!"

Maybe it's too much information, but I'm neked, just not quite in the way that quote implies.

We have a whole list of hard stuff going on. Name a family member, I'll give you a list. It's just life, the kind of  "In this world you will have trouble" life that you most likely have, too. And somehow, through all the hard stuff, I feel like God is and has stripped me bare. Sometimes I feel so raw I can hardly walk down the street, the eyes of strangers too abrasive for my sensitive soul, crushed feelings.

I feel like I am a faucet that I have previously allowed to only dribble water, slowly and suddenly the Hand of God has turned the handle as far as it will go. Out of control, I am a drowned rat, struggling to turn it back to a more manageable stream.

Or the big boat of a 70's car your dad would take to the highway, driving 90-100 miles per hour, just to 'blow the gunk out the carburetor'. Out of control, I am helpless to stop the speed, the plans of a God bigger than me.

I am stripped neked, and God is up to something. It's the best kind of naked. In the mysterious way the Living God works, it doesn't feel safe, but it's the safest, it doesn't feel survivable, but I can feel His resurrection power, I can't control anything, but I feel Him freeing, healing, wooing, loving.

Walking a path I can't see, I cling to Jesus as He holds me.

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