Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Sex & Intimacy

I am busy.

I am reading my way through a stack of 15ish books about relationship and sex. And it's making me overwhelmed, frustrated, randy, motivated, and thankful. At the same time, and separate times, and in unexpected combinations. I mean, randy & motivated are a great combination (for my husband to have me experience!), but frustrated doesn't really go with thankful! At least I don't do them together well.

Micheal and I are teaching a class entitled "Good Sex' at our church. This week is week 4 of 6 weekly classes, and it's what's really on my mind and heart.

Since my blog has been like a ghost town (ghost blog?), and I really want to write what's going on with me and what God is doing in our lives, and sex is it. So yeah, I'm talking about sex. And yeah, I said 'randy' about myself. This is crazy soup, readers.

How did this come up? What makes me(us) think I(we) know enough to teach a class? Who would even listen? I'm not sure, God, and who knows? But we know it's important, and when we were asked to teach something for a group of classes under the title, "Empowering Families," and what did we think God wanted us to share? I honestly responded that I didn't know what God wanted us to share, but that the thing He keeps pestering me about is pursuing sex & intimacy. Micheal sat with his mouth open while one of our pastors asked if we really want to talk about sex & intimacy? Well, I don't know if I really want to talk about it with a bunch of people I don't know, but it is what God is talking to me about... and Micheal said that HE could talk about sex! And here we are, talking about sex.

We are not experts, but we are willing to talk about our experiences, our difficulties and embarrassments, and what works for us. (Although I do think there are things Micheal is excellent at, I won't be really explicit here so you are probably safe to keep reading! I won't be sharing any one else's thoughts here - just what I'm learning, and the significant stuff isn't the physical stuff.) It seems like no one really wants to talk about this super important topic! The Wilson's are breaking the silence.  ;o)

To begin, we bought a bunch of books. Here are the resources we are using, noting the really excellent ones.

The 5 Love Needs of Men and Women
by Gary & Barbara Rosberg

The 5 Sex Needs of Men & Women
by Gary & Barbara Rosberg
We really liked both of these books by the Rosbergs. In fact, both books now have many notes and excessive underlining and asteric-ing in them. Great for the differences between the sexes, and how we are created to compliment each other. We also liked that the Rosbergs never imply that manipulation is useful to getting your needs met; instead the main point is to serve each other.

101 Nights of Grrreat Sex: Secret Sealed Seductions for Fun-Loving Couples 
by Laura Corn
101 Nights of Grrreat Romance: Secret Sealed Seductions for Fun-Loving Couples 
also by Laura Corn
We used these two books for something I'll probably talk about in my next post so stay tuned!

Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage
by Kevin Leman
I give this book to every engaged friend. It's great for premarital info, covers more than just sex (of course it does, Kevin Leman is great!) and deals with some relational issues. Good stuff!

Men Are Like Waffles--Women Are Like Spaghetti: Understanding and Delighting in Your Differences

Guys Are Waffles, Girls Are Spaghetti
by Chad Eastham (Bill & Pam Farrel)
The Farrel book above, rewritten for teens. We bought this for our 17 year old, his future wife will thank me.

by Ed & Gaye Wheat.
This book has been around for years and is the go-to book that Christian (pre)marriage counselors seem to recommend the most and it includes the how to, technique, and dealing with issues.

Is There Really Sex After Kids? by Jill Savage
Rekindling the Romance: Loving the Love of Your Life by Dennis Rainey
Is That All He Thinks About?: How to Enjoy Great Sex with Your Husband by Marla Taviano
Red-Hot Monogamy: Making Your Marriage Sizzle by Bill & Pam Farrel
The Married Guy's Guide to Great Sex by Clifford & Joyce Penner

So... stay tuned for more on this hot topic! And check out some of these books, I don't think you'll regret it.

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